Assumptions are rooted in the roles we play. As our responsibilities grew out of need and changing times, our roles as viewed by society never changed accordingly. Women took care of the house and children. Men worked. As women work, do they continue to take care of the house and children? Yes. At what cost? Burnout, dropout. If women don’t do it all – work, take care of children and house as well as themselves- are they judged? Yes. Do women judge each other? Yes. If women want things to change – women must be a part of that change by stopping the abuse of each other and changing expectations by setting them.
Be courageous. Hold yourself accountable for letting go of guilt in not being able to get everything done. Women can’t do it all – getting up another hour earlier or staying up one hour later (or two or three) than everyone else still won’t get it all done. Women have to ask for what they want and need and learn to delegate. And the biggest lesson of all to learn: let go when you do. Let go of the guilt and the assumptions that others will frown, be disappointed, or angry. Give yourself permission to appreciate all the good that you do. Eliminate the lesser priorities. Release them to another person or another time. Don’t expect others to change their assumptions first or at all. Let them follow your lead. And if they don’t, stand strong and let them at least see the path you’ve made. It’s a trailblazer!